2014: The Year thus Far

I’ve been away from the blog for a while, away from writing in general in fact. After “winning” NaNoWriMo last year, I decided to take a little break in December, which inadvertently turned into an extended hiatus from writing altogether. I had managed to hit the 50K word goal during the month while working full time, meeting various other obligations, and still spending time with my family, but by the end of it, I was tired, perhaps even burned out. So I decided to take a step back during the holidays, with a plan to return in January. My aim then was to finish the first draft of my Nano novel which, though it stood at 50,000 plus words on December 1, wasn’t (and still isn’t) even close to being a completed anything. I’d left the story dangling somewhere in the hazy middle, in the middle of a terrible and laborious storm if I recall correctly, and that is precisely where it stands today.

Now with the summer months nearly gone, I stand facing September as it screeches near, and I’m wondering where the hell the year went. I don’t want to make excuses for not writing and so I’m not going to dwell on the time lost. I just know this: it is time to get back to The Work. Okay, so not that work exactly. Not the half-completed nonsense novel thus far left by the wayside. Don’t get me wrong, I will finish that sloppy “zero” draft. I will eventually revise, rewrite, mold and sculpt it into something that hopefully won’t make your eyes bleed. But first I just need to get moving again, and I’ve got other projects that have been on the shelf which I feel I owe my obligations to at present.

Also, with another Nano approaching, I don’t think it’s too early to start planning the work to be done during this year’s madness. Yes, that’s right. I am crazy enough to do this thing again. This time however, I’d like to set a personal goal beyond the 50k word count. Hopefully, with a bit of planning and some time to conjure up a decent outline, I’d like to actually complete an entire draft during the month, so as to not end up with fifty thousand words of incoherent garbage that might one day resemble roughly half of a completed novel. My personal goal then will be to end up with fifty thousand words of incoherent garbage that might one day resemble an entire novel.

So I’ve had a wee little break but now I’ve got work to do. In the coming weeks I’ll be plotting and outlining the new novel as well as working to finish up another novel and a chapbook which have both been in the works for far too long. I’ll be making an effort to post more regularly to the blog, if for nothing else than to pop in and say “hi” and tell you what I had for dinner. No. I won’t really do that. No one really cares about that. But I do have a few ideas to expand upon the current content and make it reflect additional topics outside of writing. Perhaps that will liven the place up, make it more fun, like some sort of futuristic cyborg monkey disco. Wouldn’t that be cool? Anyway, I believe I also promised some posts on the NaNoWriMo experience, so as we draw closer to this year’s event in November, I’ll try to post a summary on my thoughts from the chaos of 2013. So until next time, be cool, be safe, and just write!

A Poem for Brenda: Everything

WIP Disclaimer: Ahem, the following poem is a Work In Progress. It is simple and unedited, just like me. It is likely to change before it ever, if it ever, sees (real) publication. There.

As the title of this post suggests, this one is for my wife, Brenda, but you are all welcome to read it too, I suppose. Honestly, I can't really stop you (since, ya know, it's now on display for the eleventy or so billion people on this here internet). Enjoy!

Everything

I Love her deeply but she doubts me,

challenges me.

If she could see into my heart,

she would never do so again.

If I could just show her my love

like a physical thing,

like an ocean swelling, raging,

full of emotion and madness;

If she could slip her face beyond its surface

to gain but a glimpse

of the unending depths,

she would forever trust me

having witnessed the extent

of all she means to me,

and sleep soundly at night,

knowing beyond doubt,

that she is my everything.

 

 

Posted with Blogsy

To My Daughter

I’ve been working to strengthen the ending of the Life Phase section of my poetry chapbook, Inner Phases. I tried swapping out the last couple of poems with works I had already written, but none of them had the sense of completion I’m seeking. So what do you do then? Write new poems, of course. Here’s a rough draft of one of the new works I’ve sketched out. Hope you enjoy.

To My Daughter

I can still cradle you like a newborn

And you can still let me,

Your dancing eyes like sponges

Soaking up the features of my face.

You’re big enough to walk now,

run, dance, and even climb.

 

We rock, eyes locked;

In this moment

we are each the other’s world.

To me, there is nothing else

But the faces of mother and father

Blended perfectly upon a new canvas.

 

I imagine you in years to come–

Never again will we be this close.

Too many things will come between us,

Separate us as you slowly trade

Your life of play and mom and dad

For one of friends and boys and heartaches,

Late nights with lonely fools,

Fears and scars and breaking rules.

 

Though you’ll still depend on me,

Some days you’ll resent me,

Find yourself ashamed to be seen with me,

Even scream and say that you hate me.

Your words and actions will bleed me,

But in the marrow I’ll know the truth.

 

That you are still this precious child,

Part mother, part father,

Yet a being all your own,

And we will always be your world,

And you will always be our life.